I hope the dear Savior has been revealed to me as having died for my sins, and as now being my life, my righteousness, my redemption. If I have seen him at all, I know it has been only by faith. It is the only comfort and consolation of my heart, to feel some assurance that Jesus has made himself known to my poor soul, as mine, though I am so vile by nature, and so unworthy, because of my sins and sinfulness. The evidences that this is so do not appear to my natural understanding, nor can I present them to the natural mind of another. Love to God, and to his people, and his truth, is the chief of those evidences. That sweet feeling of heavenly love, with other emotions and exercises, such as meekness, peace, joy, humbleness of mind, patience, and the like, which are contrary to my nature, have been explained to me by the Scriptures as the work of the Holy Spirit, and as evidences that I have passed from death unto life, and that Christ is in me the hope of glory. These exercises of mind, the questionings concerning them, as to whether they are spiritual or only natural, and the sharp trials and bitter afflictions of soul, on account of the daily evidences of a corrupt nature, and the temptations of the enemy, make up my life; as Isaiah says, "0 Lord, by these things men live, and in all these things is the life of my spirit."

A few words in conversation, or a few lines in writing, may give to a spiritual hearer, or reader, clear and satisfactory evidence concerning the one who speaks or writes, that Jesus has been revealed to him; but days spent in talking, when the tongue is at liberty, and volumes of writing, when the heart flows into the pages, would not fully express what the exercised soul is passing through, nor would the utmost liberty in expressing the richest experiences of grace, keep one from again and again being tempted to doubt the reality of these experiences.

How did Christ appear to me? He first appeared to me in the words, "Blessed are they who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled." Those words came with power, and through them the first hope I ever had was raised up in my soul, and for the first time I was made glad. His next appearance was in a feeling of peace which was given me, when I could not see any reason for it. The Scripture named it to me as, "The peace of God, which passeth all understanding." My sins seemed to be removed from me; the burden and curse of them were gone. That same burden has never come back, but O, how often my conscience has been pained by sins since then. The Savior has a few times been felt so powerfully within my heart, so sacredly near to me, and so all-embracing has been my love for him, that I could seem almost to feel him in the arms of my love, and could whisper my love to him, and could feel his answers of love and peace. Such times have been few, and how long it has been now since I have been favored with such a close and dear embrace, when it almost seemed that he did kiss me with the kisses of his mouth, as his precious words were made sweet to my soul; but those sweet seasons can never be forgotten. O! that I might have them oftener; O! that I might so live in the Spirit, and so walk with God, that his dear presence might be more sensibly felt by my poor soul, from day to day.

But did I never see any form, as of a man, with my mind or in my soul, at least, if not with my eye? No; I cannot say that I have. Did I never see him, or think of him, at such a time, as in a body of flesh like our own, and as occupying some seat somewhere in some particular portion of space? No. Although it would seem difficult, impossible, for me to describe how he has appeared to me, how I have felt his presence, yet I can say it has not been in form as a man, that I have apprehended him. I have ever felt that he has been revealed to me as a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief, when he bore my sins in a body which was like my own, except that his was perfect and sinless; but that now he is glorified, and that I know him no more after the flesh. If I am told that I must believe that he now sits crowned with light, clothed in a body like our own, as one of our hymns says, I must reply that I have not so seen him in my own experience. My faith has not so beheld him; if he has been revealed to my faith. There are good men who have thought that he does now exist in a body of flesh in heaven, and I will not fall out with them. But if they insist that I must so regard him, or they will not allow that I have known him, I must still say only so far as I have myself seen and known. But the Scripture seems to me to warrant my understanding of this, and confirm my experience. For as I have quoted, the apostle says, "Yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we him no more."---2Cor. v. 16. Again, "Flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of heaven ;" and again, "We know not what we shall be, but we know that when he shall appear we shall be like him." When he ascended up to heaven he was glorified, and sat on the right hand of God. He showed to his disciples, after the resurrection, the same body which was put in the grave, unchanged in any ,particular; to show that death had no power over it. Then that body became glorified, and that glorified state we cannot understand till we enter it. When our vile body shall be changed, it shall be like his glorious body, and then we shall understand it, and shall ever be with the Lord,

Of course we cannot understand spiritual things with our natural minds. Only by faith can we know them. Many conflicts among brethren arise from the effort to reconcile to our reason, things which are beyond the reach of our reason. Our reason has to do with the language which declares the miracles and mysteries of the gospel, but not with the miracles and mysteries declared; for they cannot be explained or understood by the exercise of reason. "The things of God knoweth no man, but the Spirit of God." "But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit."---1 Cor. ii. 10, 11. Reason can deal with the record that gives account of the resurrection of Christ, can go far to prove its reliability, to assure us that the original language in which it is now presented to us, is the same used by the inspired writers, and that we have it Correctly translated into Our own language. But the inspiration of the writers, reason cannot prove, nor can it help to make any one believe in the risen Son of God, nor explain in any measure, the unsearchable mystery of Christ. All these things are the secret of the Lord, and are with those who are in the secret place of the Most High, and are received and rejoiced in by faith, But reason can seem to show us some of the inconsistencies that arise from its own attempt to understand and arrange spiritual things.

When Jesus was with his disciples, after his resurrection, he gave them clear evidence that he had the same body of flesh and bones which was put into the grave; that it was entirely unchanged by death; that the grave had not produced any effect upon it. Thus death and the grave, being forced; as it were, to receive that sacred body into their dread embrace, had received all that was due to them on account of the sins of all his people, and could-do no more. His death paid the debt in full, and his own body being holy and sinless, could not be corrupted in the grave. When the appointed three days had passed, including the Jewish Sabbath, to show that all the ordinances of that law were satisfied and taken out of the way, death could not hold him any longer, nor ever have any more dominion over him. So when he had thus showed himself alive, after his passion, by many infallible proofs, being seen of his apostles and other witnesses, chosen before forty days, he was received up into heaven, and sat on the right hand of God. This is spoken of in a number of places, as being glorified. Now if our reason insists that his glorified body must be in the same state as when he was with his disciples, so that we are warranted in of it as a body of flesh and bones, reason itself will not only show Scriptures I have referred to, but also other things, as in the way of such an understanding. The most striking objection that occurs to my mind now is this: When he was with his disciples, after his resurrection, as well as before, some could be nearer to him than others. Peter, the impulsive, impetuous, loving Peter, threw himself into the sea, and swam to land, in his haste to reach the dear Savior. In last interview with him, Peter seems to be close to him, while the disciple whom Jesus loved, was following along behind. But in the glorified state there will be none nearer than others, and none following afar off, and none drooping, or backward, or out of sight. But all will be one with him, as he is one with the Father.--John xvii. 21-23; all will be like him when he appears, for we shall see him as he is, --1 John iii. 2; all will be near to him, and all will be satisfied with his likeness.

These are mysteries not possible to be understood by our natural minds, but are they not taught in the Scriptures, and do we not feel their tone in our present experience? In our present state we do not recognize the Savior's presence with our natural powers, although our natural powers are affected and controlled by h{s presence. When he is felt to be far from us, or absent altogether, it is our sins that we feel cause this, and not that others are occupying his attention, and crowding around him, so as to keep us from getting near, as was sometimes the case in the days of his flesh, when even his mother and brethren were shut out by the crowd. When he is pleased to into our souls with his blessed power, and shows us his tender and his unspeakable love, we feel more sensibly than at any other time, that all the multitude of the redeemed are close to him, without hindering us in the least from resting and rejoicing in the bosom of his love.

I believe that Jesus has "gone into heaven" with that glorified body, and "is at the right hand of the throne of the Majesty in the heavens ;" and I believe that he shall change our vile body when he shall appear, "that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the power whereby he is able to subdue even all things unto himself ;" and I receive contentedly, and hold fast, whatever the inspired Scriptures 9f truth say concerning these sacred mysteries; but I have long since ceased to expect any comfort or rest from the efforts of my own natural reason, or that of any one else, to get up among these glorious mysteries and explain them, and set them in order, according to natural principles. I am determined (with Paul's determination, I hope) to hold fast the form of sound words, which I have heard of him, in faith and love, which is in Christ Jesus; but I wish to wait patiently for the time when Jesus shah himself make me know their meaning, and feel their power, and not feel bound by any form of words, in which men have sought to establish their meaning, except as I thus feel their power.

I think my heart goes out in love to all who love the dear Savior, and with desires and prayers for their peace and prosperity, and may we all remember, while we labor for each other's welfare, that the days of trouble, perplexity and ignorance will soon be ended for us, when we shall see as we are seen, and know as we are known. However weak, and dark, and poor we may feel ourselves to be, from day to day, we shall not go far wrong, nor fall far behind, while we truly seek the mind of Christ, and desire to be led by his Spirit. And, "When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall we also appear with him in glory."

MAY 12, 1897.